This What’s Holding You Back
Yesterday, I had a pretty uncomfortable, yet much needed, revelation about the things that have been really bothering me in my life lately.
They’re the things that I’ve been avoiding talking about with anyone because I know that if I talk about it, I’ll get answers that I don’t want to hear — answers that I know I could have easily given myself.
I rarely speak of my problems out loud because I try to channel all of my inner rage, anxiety, stress, and frustration towards the things that I’m passionate about rather than spend my time complaining about them — I also don’t want people to judge me.
However, the thing about this particular method is that even after I displace my emotions, I still have those problems on my mind.
What my coworker made me aware of is that displacing my emotions about my problems is completely different than actually talking about my problems and getting them off my chest.
Talking through your problems, especially to unbiased friends, gives you the perspective that you don’t want to see (this is essentially what a therapist is for).
It shows you the third party perspective that your friends and family don’t typically give you because the people closest to you always tend to factor themselves into the mix of solutions that they offer.
When you get the lens of an outsider, you get a more honest truth. And that truth is this —
The only thing that’s holding you back is you
The thing that is stopping you from doing whatever it is that you want to do is you. You have the choice to affect change in your life. Whether it be your actual situation or your attitude towards a situation, the only thing that can turn things around is the role that you play in it.
If you have a situation that you know you can change, then ask yourself what the real consequences are. If they’re not dire consequences and you’re just making excuses for your own laziness, then know that you’re the reason why things aren’t getting better.
However, if you aren’t able to necessarily change the situation, then change the way you’re viewing the situation. Every experience, good or bad, is a learning experience. So, take what you’ve learned and use it towards finding a solution.
What’s really bothering you is the fact that you don’t like where you are in life
This is the thing that I had to personally admit to myself — And it sucked saying it out loud.
Not being where you want to be in your life can be extremely agonizing. We ideally want to become the best version of ourselves, but sometimes it’s difficult to do that when there are so many things standing in the way of achieving that goal.
What you have to do is just face each obstacle one at a time. With each obstacle that you overcome, you are so much closer to getting to where you want to be.
It certainly won’t be easy, but nothing worth having in life ever is.
It’s a scary thing when you’re staring at the mirror that you don’t want to look at — The one to show you what’s really holding you back and what’s really bothering you.
It’s scary to realize that we are the ones who truly have the power to affect change, not only in our lives, but in the lives of others.
But, it all starts with us making the first move.
“Be the change you wish to see in the world” — Mahatma Ghandi