How to Move on Without Closure

At the end of the day, sometimes we just have to leave the past in the past


Photo by Sage Friedman on Unsplash

Have you ever walked away from an argument or heated conversation and then you think of your final, witty remarks only after the conversation has already ended? Both parties’ last words have already been spoken and you’ve already walked away to only later ruminate over everything that you didn’t get to say.

For many of us, there’s nothing more infuriating than not getting in the last word. That lack of closure eats at us. But, this can and likely will happen to us over and over again throughout the course of our lives and often times, the circumstances in which we left things unsettled are completely out of our control.

And unfortunately, there’s usually not much we can do about it except to live with it and move on.

For me, I’ve experienced these moments several distinct times over the past few years, leaving me still mulling over the final words I wish I had the opportunity to say. But, I know I can’t go back in time. There’s no point in spontaneously resurfacing old conversations just to comfort my ego. so instead I moved on.

Over the past few years, I’ve had instances with family, friends, and co-workers where I felt that there was a lack of resolution. There was never any closure — for me, at least — to be able to say all of the things that I was feeling in the moment.

I was either too caught off guard or too afraid to say something at the time. It’s only now that I’ve been able to finally process all of my emotions, but have already lost the chance to tell my side of the story. And even though I still reminisce on those conversations— or lack thereof — I’ve learned how to move on despite my nostalgia.

For those of you who are still holding onto whatever grudge you’re still holding onto, I urge you find a way to move on. You’ll sleep better at night and live more peacefully once you do. But, how does one move on without closure you might ask? Well, I’ll first go into the context of my recent experiences and then I’ll let you know how I finally found some peace despite closure.

All of the things I’ll never get to say to my dead Dad



Lindsey (Lazarte) Carson

Digital Advertising Professional, Writer, Runner, and soon-to-be Mom. I write about work, relationships, culture, and life in general. Twitter: @lindseyruns